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Evolutionary Highway

May 12, 2011

For too long has the entire process of evolution been praised for being the reason why we humans, the superior animals, roam this earth today. We have dubbed ourselves  as the ultimate creators, the know-it-alls.

Something animals don't worry about

But I beg to differ, what is the big about being human? What is so great about our lives? We believe that we have it all figured out but alas we die because of our own creations. Animals on the other hand have an awesome life! You say its a dog’s life (as in sad) but guess what that furry creator is having the time of his life!

He can sniff his balls in public without being screamed at, he can laze around under a tree and not give two hoots even if Prince William is getting married or Osama is being killed. He will obtain water from any where without wondering if it has added minerals and electrolytes. Food what food? Hey as long he can munch it and won’t choke on it, he doesn’t mind it one bit. Not like us, ‘No mom I only want Kelloggs, they have extra fiber and less fatting!” Yeah right!!

They don’t have to bother about giving board exams or SATs. They aren’t bothered with sleepless nights over their future. Have you ever walked into a counselors office and seen a Lion asking her if he should take up arts or science. Is he a more creative person or more technical one? They bloody well know what they have to do. They stick to the basics- Eat, Sleep and Mate. Of course poop too! 😛

They are never bombarded with ethical dilemmas, should we be carnivores or not.  Or should they go green or step it up by becoming vegans. They like meat and they are going to gorge on it.

And guess what they don’t have to worry about pre-nups or about finding their prince. It very simple in the animal world. Intercourse isn’t for desire its for procreations, thus you don’t have to worry bout the other one cheating on you!! They will bang-bang, have kids, and move on. SIMPLE! No dating problems, gf/bf hassles.

So in my next life I’d like to be an animal. Cause in this life too I’m doing what they do, earning  money to find a nice house, good food and a cute guy, with the help of opposable thumbs!

4 Comments leave one →
  1. May 14, 2011 10:54 AM

    I can’t seem to look at this page from my iphone!!!!

  2. pintu the popat permalink
    May 21, 2011 6:51 AM

    While surfing I just stumbled across your blog. Needless to say I found it intriguing. However consider some of the losses of not being a human
    -all your lovely coco chanel , christian dior and other perfumes would go waste
    -you cannot write the lovely sprited blog that you do. the only communication is gutteral sounds, and the only response is gutteral sounds. Music to your ears, surely not 🙂
    -all the matchmaking uncleji’s auntijis, gossipy siblings, and matrimonial sites would be rendered jobless. Surely that could lead to an economic depression besides a personal one.
    Now consider the complexities of being a member of a non human species
    -substitute the words job with territory, partner with mate and so on.. the more things change , the more they remain the same
    -already women are fedup with philandering guys. in the animal kingdom this kind of behavior has official sanction especially if one is an alpha male. Ahem women rights does take a back seat.
    -ask animals if they would like to be humans before you comment. The line for such a thing would be bigger than the US Visa lines i am sure.
    So you see it’s beautiful to be human , to be alive.
    With my two opposable thumbs I therefore give you a thumbs up for the lovely wit and language and a thumbs down for your next life plans. :-))))

    • May 21, 2011 7:13 AM

      You have a point. But tell me is Coco chanel worth the stress and money-mongering? And its not like animals don’t communicate or spend time grooming themselves?
      And animals don’t indulge in intercourse for fulfilling sexual desire. The aim is to procreate, thus no need for ‘loyalty’. SO yeah i’d like to be an animal.
      hey i can roam around naked with the RSS telling me what’s moral and what isn’t!!

      • pintu the popat permalink
        May 21, 2011 11:41 AM

        As you can see it’s a rather vela Saturday for me 🙂
        i’d rather leave a Hugo Boss trail rather than a scent trail if u know what I mean :-). Hugo Boss has no worth, it’s priceless….
        And with regards to RSS and friends Poonam Pandey is that u 🙂
        Finally u c being human gives me optionality I can always pig out as a foodie when I want . But if I was a pig all i would do would be gruuntt..
        And if I wanted to ahem meet smart intelligent humans :-)- i’d have to take rebirth, not an easy choice. …
        Just in case I still don’t convice you, let me confuse you 🙂
        -imagine if you were a centipede – aah the shoe choices would be killing even with great legs
        -if you were a nightingale – bad luck we have our Ipod’s
        -or if you were a tigress- your stripes just won’t seem right everytime you went to drink water 🙂
        So as u c every species has it’s own problems..
        follow Sallu Dadaji’s advice BE HUMAN 🙂

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